Babe Shaped for Christ

You are my strength when i am weak,

You are the treasure that i seek,

You are my all in all,

seeking you as a precious jewel,

Lord, i give up, I’d be a fool,

You are my all in all

Jesus, Lamb of God,

Worthy is your name

(Repeat)

Taking my sin, my cross, my shame,

Rising up now, i’ll bless your name,

You are my all in all

When i fall down, you pick me up

When I am dry, you fill my cup,

You are my all in all.

I love you Lord….Thank you for dying for me on the cross for my sins…you are the only cure in my life…only remmedy for my soul heart and mind…..

was it aliff adam? i saw him in the evening? i cant believe my eyes….i was driving this evening at about 645pm….i thought i wasnt going to see him again.

he still look the same…dark tanned skin…short hair..person and smilling…window at the same level…i watch him..he didnt notice me. he was paying attention to his driving…while i was driving towards the other direction.

then later…i kind of lose my sense of direction. i went towards the pasar malam direction and later realize it was a road block. hehe lol…cassandra…you are weird…

hehe i was like aiks how come…what happen to me…haven’t you forgotten abt him…?? years back man…

i havent forgotten anything of my past…memories although have learn to fade…but still i cant forget how much i miss my abang angkat. hehe….

not tht i like him now…but it is just wanting him back as a friend….

everytime when i look back at the few crushes i have… i tend to look towards God in despair…lord where is the right person…perfectly fit for me…? sometimes i crave for someone tht is right beside me letting me know…"my dear…i’m here…stop crying, your heart;…the lord has only been preserving you for me; as he has preserve me for you.."

Dear father in heaven, i know he will be made perfect by you..i really do trust you. i trust that one day…one day that person planned for me by you, would come..maybe there would be…maybe there wouldnt be..hehe but i know that if it is what you have planned for me…i know your plans father GOd are perfectly fitted for me…=) this is why i’m glad about being your child. a little princess fitted for your another prince over the other end…or maybe your answer towards my plea is just being a single for life.

my plea is to know if i’m really to be married and have children of my own or to be single for life… i know time is the only thing we can find out…it takes time…and sustainence from you father God.

sometimes i give up waiting…pondering on things which are seen…instead of the unseen…i’ll wait for you to decide father GOd…everything seems to be in your control…since the day i give all my worries and hopes into your hands…you never fail my heart…

you dwell in my heart lord jesus…you know how i felt today…but although i’m weak right now with so many other hinderances in life…i know you understand it all…you are right beside me…i just can wait silently until my lord God answer to my questions of this in my life…

you know tht i’m praying my heart out to you everytime i face challenges…but my dear father in heaven…you just knew it all… father God would you just take this feelings off me.

sometimes i wondered how much more should i be mature enough to just let GO everything?? father you just know it all…my immaturities…my weaknesses…my worries…my not so good attitudes…my ok personality…my bad thinking and etc etc…

hehe i’m very immature….a little baby in the Lord tht just want to grow up quick like a mature christian is. Thinking that can feel better but it seems like i’m pressuring myself..trying to be a grown up…sometimes…although most of the time i learn to rely on the lord for strength…just to conclude without the Lord…i’m alrd long time in the drain…

I’m learning to lean unto him, learning to let Go and let God everytime i face obstacles ahead… maybe some ppl can see it…and maybe some cant….the more ppl do not know abt this …the better person i’ll be….

hehe coz i never like ppl to think negatively abt me…but no matter what is all happening i might not know it now, nor do i know the outcome… is to honour God always…and to live a life pleasing to my Lord…coz he love endures and i’ll never leave him this time round..i learn a lesson 2 years back….=)

good rest for most of us at home….=) Feeling recharged after a week of rest without heading to anywhere for any tuitions, classes or work.

Next week will be starting part time tuition again… having violin classes…it is resuming…cant wait to see my kids in tuition..pray that they’ll be as attentive as the first month…=) very happy that they are enjoying classes…

just have to continue to pray for them. Joy especially is keen in bible reading…i will be happy if she’ll continue to have the keeness to know the word of God as well as about God.

I’m very blessed that the Lord have provided this little attentive students to ease my burden…while teaching… very easy to reach across them. Although most of the time they never listen in class…but overall they can get things into their minds very easily.

looking forward to seeing them soon. as for my standard 3 & 4 students…never really have the time to spend time with them in their english. Prayerfully hope that i’ll be able to have enough time for them as well.

form 4 & 5 phew seems unprogressive…just help them in a few classes…some only came once. Maybe the only time i have is only sunday…most of the time sunday is my rest day…so most of the time classes for them are neglected…feeling sorry for them..but again…if in 3 months i dun really help them much then i think i’ll seek for cancelling the class. if not it’ll be like a class of hanging students with no direction. =) pray for me ya?

God Bless you all….

scary….eiu

he was my dad’s former worker….

the first time he asked me for my hphone number i tot it was alrite to do so. maybe i wasnt matured enough to think about the danger…. i just gave him the number without thinking twice.

later then he called when he was in KL….asking me to meet him up. thank God i was very tired and taking my nap and i didnt feel like going out. He insisted that i should meet up with him…gosh like a little boy asking me out. I thought about it and thank God over it…not knowing that he was a desprate person.

One day when i’m back mentakab…helping up in my dad’s shop….my dad’s clerk told me about the other worker that he tries to get girls interested in him. Desprate with any girls around him.

Scary…scary….few days back i saw him. I’ve alrd change my handphone number. He asked me if i changed my number… and told me that he couldnt contact me. I was stunt…and told him that i didnt really let everyone in my list know abt my hpone number…which is very true…

So he ask for my number again. I try not to give him my number…tried not to look at him…feeling sorry for him…that i was avioding his question…by protecting myself…being a little selfish but again…afraid that if he gets my phone number again he’ll try contacting me…and then scary…..

afraid of him. i told my dad’s workers and they tired to help me let him know that i was having lunch in the room. He left my shop finally…phew…

I went out for lunch with my adoptive dad right after he left. I saw him in the bus station. i was again stunt…then he say he was heading home…i told him..i’m heading to have my lunch…dint really talk more about anything.

it is good that he is not staying in mentakab…if not i believe that it’ll be very dangerous for most of the girls around. btw he dont go for looks….this is what scares me….i’m not pretty…suprise y he is so easily attracted to me…lol but the fact is he goes for anybody….

George Matheson beautifully wrote:

There is an Eye that never sleeps,
Beneath the wind of night.
There is an Ear that never shuts,
When sink the beams of light.
There is an Arm that never tires,
When human strength gives way.
There is a Love that never fails,
When earthly love decay.

i do not know if any of you felt that everytime when you are in life struggles there are always a person to help you up?? if there are, dont you think that it is God sent person just to help you up during the time of need and fustrations??

I’m so happy that God is so good to give me people that i look up to as well as people that need help…either or another i felt that the Lord is blessing each of everyone of us in the Lord because of His convenant for us as a christian.

today what i learn from pastor rickson is that Jesus is in my heart…and that i really need to know that. It struck me because i forget about it…when he ask me this question where is jesus?? then i answered jesus is sitting in the right hand of God the father and He is coming back soon. wow i thought that was a splendid answer…but to the lord…it might not be…

why do i say that…when pastor let me know tht jesus is also in my heart…i was stunt for a moment why God…why do i forget this thing that i so precious to me…

one question that i want to post it in my blog is this.. where is Jesus?? fetching comments to anybody…

Babe Shaped for Christ…

God loves to use weak people. In fact, we all have a bundle of flaws & imperfections: physical, emotional, intellectual & spiritual. You may also have uncontrollable circumstances that weaken you, such as financial or relational limitations. The more important issue is what you do with these.

We usually deny our weaknesses, defend them, excuse them, hide them & resent them. This prevents God from using them the way he desires. God have different perspective in our weaknesses.

Isaiah 55:9

For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

1 Cor 1:27

But god has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty.

Your weaknesses are not an accident God deliberately allowed them in your life for the purpose of demonstrating his power through you. God has never been impressed with strength or self- sufficiency. In fact, he is drawn to people who are weak & admit it.

Bible is filled with examples of how God loves to use imperfect, ordinary people to do extra ordinary things in spite of their weaknesses. We are fragile & flawed & break easily. But God uses us if we allow him to work through our weaknesses.

Most of our weaknesses increase our capacity for sympathy, ministry and grace. We’ll be more compassionate & considerate towards other people’s weaknesses. Other people are going to find healing in your wounds.

Your greatest life messages & your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts. The things you’re most embarrassed about, most ashamed of & most reluctant to share…these are the very tools God can use most powerfully to heal others.

Moses weakness was his temper. It caused him to murder an Egyptian, strike the rock he was supposed to speak to 7 breaks the tablets of the Ten Commandments. Yet God transform Moses into the humblest man on earth. (Read numbers 12:3)

Gideon’s was low  self-esteem & deep insecurities, but God transformed him into a mighty man of valor. (Read Judges 6:12

Abram’s weakness was fear. Not once but twice, he claimed his wife was his sister to protect himself. But God transformed Abraham into “the father of those who have faith” (Read Romans4:11)

The weak-willed Peter became a rock (Matt 16:18). The adulterer David became “a man after my own heart” (Acts 13:22). John, one of the arrogant “sons of thunder,” became the Apostle of Love. The list goes on.

The more honest you are about your weaknesses, the more grace of God you’ll get. Our strengths create competition but our weaknesses create community.

God works best when we admit our weaknesses….=) that is why I’m very happy to see bold testimonies during rbs 2007 graduation day. It really make me rejoice in the Lord that my bro & sis who are away from God…revived themselves and renewed in the RBS. To us it my mean nothing, but to them their future will be god’s living testimony of weak people that are transformed by the power of God’s grace & love. May our Lord God bless you all and be a blessing to others…but honest to know and share your weaknesses…in due time He will lift you up. Honesty is the best policy. =P

Uncle Hilmy ( Pastor Hilmy aka Ex RBS Principle)

& RBS 2003 students. Sam, Vina, Me & Esther.

Uncle Hilmy & I

Uncle Bobby & I

memories of RBS 2003 just came into my thoughts. =) miss my batch.

Today, during my morning devotion. I felt that god was talking to me about how wrong I was about thinking lowly about a brother which was in service with me in the Lord… I told a very close sister in the lord about this situation and ask for prayer support and ask the lord to give me the wisdom to speak about things that are of good wisdom that comes from our father in heaven, yesterday. Although it was intended to pray for that particular bro/sis, I realize that in during my sharing…I was having a judgmental attitude.

2 Chronicles 25:2 And he did [that which was] right in the sight of the LORD, but not with a perfect heart.

In 2 Chronicles 25:2, it says that King Amaziah did what was right in the sight of the Lord, but not with a loyal heart. Although most of the time I might think that I’m doing what is right in the eyes of the Lord…I might not be doing it with a loyal heart and it might not be acceptable to God at all.

This verse really strike me to the heart, God show’s me that I needed to be more humble in everything I do for Him. I do my part as a servant in His service…be for the Lord…He’ll take care and convict the rest of the servants in His own will and time.

Philippians 2:4 Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.

Real servants serve God with a mindset for God. They focus more on others and not on themselves. They’ll become more aware of needs around them. Real servants will not try to use God for their own purposes. Through this quiet time with Him, I learnt that everyone is selfish by nature. We tend to think highly about ourselves. But in god’s definition; self denial is the core of servanthood. Servants think about their work, not what others are doing. Our goal is make God look good, not ourselves.

Romans 14:4 Who art thou that judgest another man’s servant? to his own master he standeth or falleth. Yea, he shall be holden up: for God is able to make him stand.

In this verse, God told me about how much I need to learn not to talk about others not serving God in their full extend or etc etc. But believe and trust that God will make that fellow servant stand when he/she is convicted by God Himself.

Matthew 5:41 And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain.

Other than learning to be a servant…todays reading talks about how money could draw us away from God…if we treat it as our masters. When Jesus is my master, money serves me, but if money becomes my master, I become its slave. Wealth is not a sin, but failing to use it for God’s glory is a sin. After the Lord taught me and rebuke me through these verses of scripture he comforted me in His verse of scripture.

Hebrews 6:10 For God [is] not unrighteous to forget your work and labour of love, which ye have shewed toward his name, in that ye have ministered to the saints, and do minister.

Speaking quietly to me that He’ll never never forget my labour for Him. To those people out there that I serving the Lord and no one knows about it…get encouraged with this words of scripture…it’ll do you well…as it is always a blessing to be a servant of God…the lord will remember your labours…so never never stop serving God… serving Him is a blessing.

We’ve been given different assignments in life, we’re uniquely shaped. We just have to trust God and keep serving Him and He’ll help others along the way to draw them to Himself.

Don’t say you do not have any ability to serve God

You have dozens, probably hundreds, of untapped, unrecognized, and unused abilities that are lying dormant inside you. Many studies have reveal that the average person processes from 500 to 700 different skills and abilities-for more than you realize.

For instance, your brain can store 100 trillion facts. Your mind can handle 15,000 decisions in a second, as is the case when your digestive system is working. Your nose can smell up to 10,000 different odors. Your touch can detect an item 1/25,000^th of an inch thick, and your tongue can taste one part of quinine in 2 million parts of water.

You are a bundle of incredible abilities, an amazing creation of God. Part of the church’s responsibility is to identify and release your abilities for serving God.

isn’t it amazing…how God made us to be…special and uniquelly one of a kind…each have each special abilities…

B.A.B.E Shaped for Christ =)

so fast time flies…seems like just a few weeks….

cant believe that i havent been sleeping in an aircond room for more than a month now….but aircond room will be coming soon…

hehe desiree cant stand heat…so bear with it lol. but kinda miss her being around…and kinda like…planning what she can help me with when she comes home (terrible sister cassey =P)

i felt tht i can work with her a lot more better…coz most of the time she listens to you…i’m proud of her most of the time, coz she is pretty teachable at times…depends on which situation…

=P…she is coming back soon..i’ll be glad coz there will be a company around…=) to chat at nite…share the room together, watch movies together…,go shopping for cds together…,window shopping together… and the list goes on…

cant wait to see her back with her rbs memories….i believe she is enjoying it. when she calls back she seems happy being there…i’m not sure where did she went for mission trip…as for me i went to penang for the mission trip… it was awesome being in a place where you havent been before…

lovely view…of the ocean how marvelous is God’s creation…=)

shapebabe